philosophy beyond my understanding

So, I'm over here with one of my good friends from Stout, Jake, and we both have the same views of the world and art and whatnot but when I talk to Jake I realize that he is far more in depth with everything that is going on. We can start talking about any subject from the great world of Japanese animation to the ways our country works and it always ends up coming down to Jake getting into this long and deep tangent of his perspective of things and it evolves into this sort of philosophical explanation of things far greater than what we were originally talking about. He actually gets so into it that it becomes impossible to get a work in edge-wise, but at the same time I become so interested in not necessarily just what Jake is saying, but more how he's saying it and how much of his mind he's starts to speak with no censorship.

I know it is really starting to sound like I'm rambling on and on about nothing but this has a point, I promise.

Every time I listen to Jake go on talking about this and rambling about that I think about what my philosophy is. How do I see this world? What standards or guidelines do I live my day-to-day life through? Is there any way I could possible describe such a philosophy to anyone if I was able to figure it out? All of this really got sparked when I started to read this book all about the basics of philosophy throughout history. Every one of the big questions that so may great thinkers filled their days with trying to figure out the true and absolute answers to, all inspired me to think deeper about the things around me. I don't know if I could explain such a philosophy that compels me to live out life everyday. I only know certain guidelines that keep my head on straight and help me cope with the world. One word comes to mind, "Optimism." Everything that happens to me throughout the day I constantly try to keep my mind on the positive outcome of each situation.

I was really debating with myself whether to tell everyone about this or not but I figure it's really something that has given me an interesting view on some things and it relates to this whole optimistic thing I'm getting into, so here it goes:

I was out swimming with some of my German friends during the evening of about the third day here in Germany. I was going to swim out with them to the middle of the lake to a buoy and then swim back. The dumb part about this whole thing was that I was still experiencing some of the jet lag and my diet had changed pretty dramatically within those first couple of days.

So as I approached the middle of Lake Hohnsen I began to feel pretty tired and I turned back toward the shore. As I swam I started to get really dizzy and disoriented. I stopped to look around and see if I could get to a closer shore but I was the same distance from the nearest sides so all I could do was try to conserve my energy and back stoke toward the main shore. The only thing on my mind was that I was stuck in the middle of this lake with no one who could possibly help me and I had a big chance that I might drown. But my mind didn't keep on that thought for long, I needed to be motivated to make it and I just had to keep looking up at the sky thinking of how beautiful the day was and how excited I was to be in Germany to learn a whole new perspective of design.

After what seemed like an hour of swimming I finally made it back and I could hardly breath, but I made it and that's all that mattered. I'm pretty sure it was the scariest thing that has ever happened to me. I got through all of that only because I didn't think about the shitty things going on right then, all the bad outcomes that could have happened.

I'm not sure if thinking about only the good things is really something that helps me in every situation because at times I choose to be ignorant of issues that are going on, not just for me but for everyone. I don't want to waste my time in life feeling depressed or hating all the crappy things that go on everyday.

I'm not sure if this whole entry had much of a point to it and I'm not saying that everyone should just forget about the serious issues that are going on around us (considering that's one of my downfalls). I'm only saying there are a lot of people in the world who get so caught up in the depressing things and they forget that something good always comes out of every situation.

I went all over the place with this one but I was just saying exactly what I was thinking, which can get kind of messy and disorganized. As the great Walt Whitman wrote, "Always keep your face toward the sun, and shadows will fall behind you."
Remember it and love it.

~ Complete awesomeness ~